The Wasteland Diaries
by joshuagrah4m
Summary: Life in the Vault is all Cath has ever known, but when her dad escapes one night, she quickly realizes life in the Vault is about to change. Forced to leave in order to avoid death, Kath is thrown into the wasteland to fend for herself. Searching for her dad, she learns he's been lying about her past. Her quest to find her dad quickly turns into a quest to find the truth.


Bottlecaps are good, radiation is bad. I don't own Fallout, and that makes me sad.

**AUTHORS NOTE: This is a canon story. I'm writing it to go along in the same way my current Fallout 3 playthrough is. Everything that occurs in my specific game is the only things that will be included. Also, the italicized words are obviously my characters thoughts. The bolded ones, however, are flashbacks. **

_ I'm at the Vault door. Fear and excitement swirl within me. I activate the switch, and a smile transforms my face as I walk to the moving door. As it comes to a stop, I take my first step out of the Vault. The second I do, my eyes fall upon a horrible image. Jonas is standing in front of me, but it isn't Jonas. Not how I know him. His glasses are broken and skewed on his face. His once bright eyes are dark and lifeless, his body riddled with holes. Blood drips from a single finger as he points at me. He slowly shuffles towards me, uttering a single phrase that raises the hair on the back of my neck. _

_ "This is all your fault." _

I awake in a cold sweat, my body throbbing from the hard ground I've slept on. A scream dies on my lips once I realize it was only a dream. The sky is still dark, and as I look at my pip-boy, I note that I've been asleep for only an hour. Standing up, I try to shake off the feeling my dream has left me with. The sight of Jonas' body refuses to leave, so I grit my teeth and just start walking. I see a small settlement nearby, and according to my pip-boy, it's called Megaton. I know I should go. I _need _to go, if only for myself. I can't survive much longer on my own. I need help.

**_ Gunshots and screaming surround me, and I'm struck by how strange they sound compared to the relative calmness of the Vault. The sight of the blood and violence distracts and unnerves me. Everything is loud, so loud I can't hear myself breathing, despite the ragged breaths I can't seem to draw in fast enough. My hand tightens on the gun in my hand, and I try not to think as another body hits the floor. Stepping over the body, I continue to run through the halls, desperate to get to The Overseers office. I'm nearly there as I hear another loud bang. Pain explodes in my shoulder, and I realize I've been shot. I bite my lip, holding back a scream as I swing my arm in the direction the bullet came from, pulling the trigger. I hear the body thud, and as I continue running, finally making it into the office, I'm suddenly thankful for the bb gun, and training, my father and Jonas gave me for my birthday. _**

I check my gun, both making sure I have enough bullets to take care of anything that I may come across on my way to the small town, and using it as a distraction to the scene that's constantly replaying in my mind. I take my time walking, taking in the wasteland around me. I'm unsure if it's my resentment to the Vault, or if it's how I truly feel, but I can't help noticing the beauty within the destruction. Ruined buildings line the land in the distance, destroyed roads crossing in every directions.

I approach the towns entrance, and I see that it's surrounded by a high metal wall of sorts, with a robot standing guard at the door. As I slowly walk towards the robot, I resist the urge to sigh.

_This might not be too easy to get in, but at least it's safe, _I think to myself.

Surprisingly, I'm immediately let in. I stand still, taking in the site of the first town I've ever seen. People are just... walking. They're doing what they want, not what they're told. The openness of it all takes me by surprise, and while the unfamiliarity is uncomfortable, it's also freeing. Not for the first time, I think of how since I'm not in the Vault, I can do whatever I want. But this time, I'm seeing that freedom with my own eyes, and it makes it more real. The heavy metal door slams to a close behind me, making me flinch and effectively pulling me out of my observation.

**_ I slam the door shut, leaning against it. As unwilling as I am to admit it, I'm scared. I'm scared, and I'm hurt, and most of all I'm angry. I'm supposed to be safe in this Vault. We all are. But Jonas is dead, and my dad... My dad is gone. I'm alone, and I could die. I glance at the gun in my hand, and for the first time, the thought of suicide crosses my mind. I have nobody to protect me, no family. I'm not a child, but I'm only 19. I don't know how to survive on my own. Remembering the pain and the heat from the bullet, I dismiss the idea of using the gun to end it. I shakily pull up my pip-boy, planning to see what chems I have and whether or not it'll be enough, when I look at the screen and see my name lit up in front of me. Cath. The memories start flooding back. My mother, Catherine. My mother died for me. _****Because ****_of me. I remember the passage my father has read to me countless times, and I realize I couldn't do this to myself. Even if I can't find my father, I have to keep going for her. _**

A man walks up to me, introducing himself as the Towns Sherriff, Lucas Simms. After a brief lecture on behaving myself, he directs me to the saloon, instructing me to talk to a man called Moriarty. I make my way to him, thrilled that I've found somebody who knows my father so quickly. I walk into the door and my first sight is of a... person... if you could you call it that. I approach him, intending to ask if he's Moriarty, or if he knows where he is, but before I can speak he asks me if I want a drink. I politely decline, and I'm surprised to see him sound so shocked at not being treated like shit. Instantly, I regret my original thoughts and vow to be kind to him, and anyone like him, which I've learned is called a ghoul. After finding Moriarty's office, he's nowhere to be found. A quick look through to room allows me to find his terminal password, where I learn that my dad went to someplace called Galaxy News Radio. Eventually, I find Moriarty to make sure the information is real, and after a bit of trouble, finally get him to talk. He's a jackass, and I'm about to just leave and figure out a different way to find my dad, when he says something that shakes me to my core. While I play it off as a joke, insisting I already knew this information and this wasn't the first time I was told, I know my face must reveal how shocked I am.

" Your father brought you to the Vault right after you were born. To keep you safe, you see. I remember it well - you stayed in my saloon, after all."

_**I straighten up, quickly dismissing the thoughts of death. I need to focus so I can get out of here. I quickly press the needle of a stimpack into my shoulder, ignoring the small pinch as I inject the medicine into the wound. I quickly unlock the terminal, and open the hatch leading to the Vault entrance. My pain, my fear, and my anger disappears instantly as I see the door in front of me. **_

**_ I'm finally leaving the Vault. For the first time in my life, I'm going into the real world. I never dreamed this was possible, yet here I am. No overseer, no rules, no being forced to be near people you hate. For the first time, I'm finally free._**

_Your life is a lie. Your entire life, your dad knew. He knew this, and he never told you. You weren't born in the Vault. If he could lie about that, what else has he lied about? Did he lie about my mom? He had to know that I would be accused of knowing where he went. This is all his fault. If he would've taken me with. God, if he just fucking warned me, I wouldn't be in this situation. I wouldn't be faced with the reality that I could die at any fucking second. How did he expect me to live through this? _

I flinch slightly. I hadn't meant to think that. However, as soon as the thought makes itself known, I have to admit the truth in it, as much as it hurts. I quickly leave the saloon, and walk behind the building, finding a spot that I could be alone at. I sit in the dirt, my head between my knees as I try to control the emotions raging within me. My dad isn't stupid. He knows me. He knows that the Vault could never have prepared me for this.

I've killed people. Not just anybody, people I know. People I grew up with. I took them from their families. I've almost died as well. Hell, the entire Vault could be dead now. And he's the reason. I don't blame him for wanting to leave, I don't... It's just... He left _me. _He could've warned me. He could have made sure I would be safe. Jonas _died _for gods sake. Did he not think that I could face that same fate? Did he not care?

I take a deep breath, telling myself I have one minute. One minute to grieve. To give in to the fear and anger that have been ever present since I left the Vault. One minute, and then I'll get up. I won't let these feelings overcome me anymore. One minute, and I focus solely on the one thing I left for.

The minute passes, and I raise to my feet. I run my dirty fingers through my hair, making a mental note to cut it short whenever I find scissors. I place my gun in the belt of my jumpsuit, and I quickly and quietly exit through the heavy metal door that guards these people from whatever's out there.

Staying true to my thoughts, I feel no trace of fear. I don't feel much of anything. I mark the location in my pip-boy, and head towards the building. All of this information, as much as I wish I didn't know about it, has changed my motives in this quest. No longer do I simply want to find him so he can be here to help me. I'm starting to realize that if I can't help myself, I won't be alive to find him.

No, I don't want help. I want answers. I want the truth, no matter how painful. I _need _the truth.


End file.
